It’s been a little while since I have done a blog post, and to be honest the reason for that is that gosh darn funk I talked about in my previous post (you can read it Here)! I have been in a state of extreme confusion lately over a lot of different things in my life: business, friendships, my job, where I’m going, what I’m going to do to get there, etc.
For the first time in my life, I’m struggling finding the answers. Typically I can get a glimmer, or an idea will spark – but this time it is different. This time it’s just a bunch of haze that I can’t seem to work my way through entirely.
I know when this happens, it is best to step away from being super public because I prefer to put out positive vibes, rather than negative – and when I’m not feeling particularly inspired or positive I don’t want to put that out into the Universe via social media. Being open and honest is one thing, but “venting” every day is something totally different.
I’ve sort of gone into more of a hermit-like state: lots of alone time, time outside, time over-analyzing (because that’s what I do!!), and time just WISHING I could get back on track.
I read in one of my books somewhere that these times happen, it’s totally normal, and when they do it’s best to just ride them out. It’s the Universe slowing us for a reason. There is a lesson to be learned here, things to discover, things to realize, and areas to grow in. Sometimes we slow down specifically to allow ourselves to speed up down the road. I mean think about it, everything that is fast in life must refuel – right? Engines always need to take a break for repair for refuel – our journeys are similar. Sometimes it may seem like we are just stopped – but we don’t realize just how far we are actually moving during that time as our “engine” repairs & refuels. As frustrated as I get during these periods – I like to remind myself that this is my journey, and that periods of stagnancy are always a part of a journey. They have to be in order to continue forward with the energy that is required to get you to the next step.
During my “hermit time” I’ve had thoughts about money, relationships, where I am putting my energy vs. where more energy needs to be placed, my body, my self-confidence, the way I want to live my life, and my happy. Every single area has been in total question-mode for about the past month and while there have been no HUGE breakthroughs – there have been crumbs here and there that can and will lead to breakthroughs down the road I’m sure. The KEY to the breakthrough, though, is the action put forward to make it happen. Here are a few of mine — I figure sharing will help with accountability:
Thought: If I want the things I want (place in the woods, place on the beach, etc.) it’s going to require more discipline with my money.
Action: I have canceled many of my autoship items: Stitch Fix, Fabletics, Ipsy, etc. While I love these little treats I signed myself up for – it really doesn’t make much sense to have them when I (a) Currently have enough workout clothes (b) Still love to shop in stores. If I didn’t have, or liked to do, either of these things – perhaps these services would make sense, but at this point they are just added funds leaving my bank account “just cause”. They aren’t going to something I really WANT, they are just going towards things I like to HAVE. See the difference? Just canceling these services alone increased my savings potential towards the things I REALLY want by $430 a quarter, or $1,720 a year. That might not sound like much – but my goal is to have what I want in the next 10 years. I’ll take an extra $17,000 towards those goals – wouldn’t you?
Thought: I am completely unhappy with where my body is right now. I have been better before and I want to get back there
Action: I have started incorporating more cardio each week (usually 5 days worth), will be incorporating more Yoga with my Yoga challenge starting on Memorial Day in order to keep my body in great working condition and allowing it to repair from the increased cardio, and am sticking with my weight training. In addition, I still allow myself to go out to eat (as that is one of my favorite social activities); however, I am trying new things on the menu. Not only is this keeping me in check with my nutrition better than my typical burger & fries would, but it’s also allowing me to experience new tastes and cuisines which, for a foodie, is quite exciting!
Thought: I am tired of putting so much energy and time into people and not receiving it back in return.
Action: I am actively working on not forcing relationships. If you want me as a friend, that’s awesome! Let’s do this awesome friendship thing together – but if you are going to rely on me to pull a friendship through or only to help you through your tough times – I can no longer commit myself to those sorts of relationships. A friendship should be two people supporting one another through good times and bad times, not one person lugging the dead weight behind them up the hill. That’s not a friendship. As someone who really values relationships and puts my whole heart into whomever is in front of me in the moment and needs my help or my support – this is probably more difficult than any of the other areas to allow myself to “Let go and Let God”. But I’m trying!!
Thought: I have no idea where I’m going or how I’m going to get there.
Action: I am learning to just allow things to happen. I love to control things to the best of my ability – so the journey of life can be quite frustrating for me! There are so many unknowns! Will I be in my job forever? Will it get better or will it get worse? Will I always have my business? Will I always have my friends? Will I ever move to the beach? What about the woods? Will I ever payoff x,y,z. WHO KNOWS!!! That’s the beauty of it. Theres is no answer, there is just the journey – day in, and day out the journey is what will always remain constant. All I can do here is keep my eye on the prize and remind myself to work towards those things each and every day – and the easiest way to do that is just to slow down and think before acting on impulse. By staying focused on what I want, I will remain in the right frame of mind to guide my activities forward in the right direction – and if I discover something along the way that shifts my journey a different way – that’s okay too! That’s why it’s a journey 🙂
My hope is that this (long) post inspired some of you to put some action behind your desire to change. It’s not easy. Times get tough – but we all have to fight through. The journey is worth the struggle bus ride that we sometimes take to experience the really cool things along the way, and ultimately lead us to exactly where we were always meant to be. So press on, Freelyfers! and don’t forget to smile along the way
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